As the saying goes, "what a difference a year can make", but I'm not so sure time changes everything.
I can barely believe that this week marks a year since my Dad died.
I've been dreading this week for quite some time, and now it's here, and I'm not quite sure how to handle it. The memories of a year ago are as fresh today as if they had just happened today.
I decided to mark my Dad's passing by being vegetarian for the month of April. This time last year, the whole family had to be vegetarian for all of the rituals and ceremonies that needed to be performed. We started the day my Dad died and kept it up for a month. I've decided going forward that I will continue to be vegetarian every April in memory of my dad. It will hopefully act as a reminder to me of the many sacrifices my parents made for their family to provide us all a better life. In some ways I feel it's the least I can do.
The next 48 hours will be pretty tough I think. I've decided to take a vacation day on the 19th - I'm just not sure I'm up to being around people all day, and I'm not convinced that I have enough of a grip on my emotions to not lose it entirely, especially if anyone were to say anything.
I miss my Dad terribly. I miss the calls he'd make for no other reason than to see how I was doing. He had so many pet names for me; Sugarplum, babe, baby, the most beautiful girl in the world, his most beautiful daughter (but I think he said that to all of us), mama, etc I wasn't just "the" baby, I was HIS baby, and he always made me feel like I was the center of his world.
My Dad always told me how proud he was of me, and never missed an opportunity to tell me how much he loved me. hope that if I had the chance to talk to him just one more time, he'd still feel the same way.
Sophie's blog
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. ~ Jack Layton
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
One Year Later
I can scarcely believe that one year ago today is when the journey with my Dad started.
A year ago today my dad had a severe enough bleed at home that the decision was made for his safety (and our sanity) that he needed to be moved to a hospital for his care.
Needless to say, he was not in the least bit happy about being moved, but when we weighed the cost-benefit of him staying at home versus being in a hospital with trained professionals, reason won out in the end and he was moved to the Riverview centre.
I'm glad I wasn't there that night for the bleed at home - I'm not good with that kind of stuff (numbers are more my thing), and ultimately, the stress that his care at home was placing on the entire family was starting to reach a peak.
I got home today and did my usual routine - grab my iPod, check for mail, see the pooch, rustle something up for dinner, etc
I was warming up some leftovers and saw an email from an old friend - someone whom I hadn't heard from in some time. He had written to let me know that his father passed away last Monday, Jan 23rd. His mother had passed away several years ago, and his father has been on his own since. He was a very active member in his community, and accomplished many great things.
I called to leave a message for him to say how sorry I was about his Dad, but given where my head is at this week with my own Dad, it was a little too close to home. I hope to chat with him sometime this week to express my condolences personally.
The irony of it is - I was off work last week on vacation and had every intention of contacting him, but didn't for some reason. I guess as usual, the universe has it's own sense of order and I didn't contact him for a reason.
Anyway - I hope he's doing ok, and I hope to get some more information later this week around the circumstances of his father's passing.
RIP I.A.Q
A year ago today my dad had a severe enough bleed at home that the decision was made for his safety (and our sanity) that he needed to be moved to a hospital for his care.
Needless to say, he was not in the least bit happy about being moved, but when we weighed the cost-benefit of him staying at home versus being in a hospital with trained professionals, reason won out in the end and he was moved to the Riverview centre.
I'm glad I wasn't there that night for the bleed at home - I'm not good with that kind of stuff (numbers are more my thing), and ultimately, the stress that his care at home was placing on the entire family was starting to reach a peak.
I got home today and did my usual routine - grab my iPod, check for mail, see the pooch, rustle something up for dinner, etc
I was warming up some leftovers and saw an email from an old friend - someone whom I hadn't heard from in some time. He had written to let me know that his father passed away last Monday, Jan 23rd. His mother had passed away several years ago, and his father has been on his own since. He was a very active member in his community, and accomplished many great things.
I called to leave a message for him to say how sorry I was about his Dad, but given where my head is at this week with my own Dad, it was a little too close to home. I hope to chat with him sometime this week to express my condolences personally.
The irony of it is - I was off work last week on vacation and had every intention of contacting him, but didn't for some reason. I guess as usual, the universe has it's own sense of order and I didn't contact him for a reason.
Anyway - I hope he's doing ok, and I hope to get some more information later this week around the circumstances of his father's passing.
RIP I.A.Q
Monday, September 19, 2011
Another beautiful day
It was another gorgeous day today in Winnipeg and I got to enjoy some of it outdoors with the pooch.
The day started off getting an oil change, followed by an amazing Indian lunch at one of my favourite Indian restaurants in town - Clay Oven. I ordered their Chicken Thali, which is essentially a chicken platter that gives you the opportunity to try a multitude of different dishes without having to commit to any one certain dish. Of course, as usual, I brought home more than half of it, which will serve perfectly as tomorrow's tasty lunch! :)
After that I went in to work for a bit (on my day off) to see about the outcome of a client concern I had over the weekend, and to drop some stuff off for some colleagues.
I came home afterward and took the pooch out for a long walk. He's always so ecstatically happy to be outside, running around and enjoying all the sights, sounds, and smells. He was pretty tuckered out by the time we got home, and even as I blog, he's sleeping at my feet. Fresh air is a great sleeping pill for dogs! :)
The day started off pretty cool outside, so I had planned on making a big pot of chicken noodle soup, but by the time we came back from our walk, it was close to 25'C and soup didn't seem like such a great idea anymore. I didn't have anything else planned, so I made soup anyway, and at least will have it for later in the week, when I'm sure it'll get cooler again.
We just came back from a visit to Home Depot and Rona looking in to replacing our garage door and our storm door. By the time all the renos are done, the front of the house will look beautiful - I hope!
The day started off getting an oil change, followed by an amazing Indian lunch at one of my favourite Indian restaurants in town - Clay Oven. I ordered their Chicken Thali, which is essentially a chicken platter that gives you the opportunity to try a multitude of different dishes without having to commit to any one certain dish. Of course, as usual, I brought home more than half of it, which will serve perfectly as tomorrow's tasty lunch! :)
After that I went in to work for a bit (on my day off) to see about the outcome of a client concern I had over the weekend, and to drop some stuff off for some colleagues.
I came home afterward and took the pooch out for a long walk. He's always so ecstatically happy to be outside, running around and enjoying all the sights, sounds, and smells. He was pretty tuckered out by the time we got home, and even as I blog, he's sleeping at my feet. Fresh air is a great sleeping pill for dogs! :)
The day started off pretty cool outside, so I had planned on making a big pot of chicken noodle soup, but by the time we came back from our walk, it was close to 25'C and soup didn't seem like such a great idea anymore. I didn't have anything else planned, so I made soup anyway, and at least will have it for later in the week, when I'm sure it'll get cooler again.
We just came back from a visit to Home Depot and Rona looking in to replacing our garage door and our storm door. By the time all the renos are done, the front of the house will look beautiful - I hope!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Goodbye, Summer ....
Summer is quickly coming to an end. Only a few more days and we're officially into Fall. Only a few more weeks and we're likely to see the first few snowflakes.
I remember as a child, the days and seasons seemed so long. It felt like it took forever for the summer to pass before you could go back to school and see your friends again, but somehow, as an adult, time just seems to go by so fast.
I'm constantly reminded at work how quickly time goes by. We use the Julian Calendar to derive our confirmation numbers for our clients, so it's a daily reminder of how far we've come, and how little time we have left. Today is day 261. We're officially more than 70% of the way through the year. Sobering thought, eh?
Today was beautiful - sunny and warm. The evenings are quite cool now, often falling below zero, but we're still able to pull off some pretty warm days. There's nothing I treasure more than my last few steps before I enter my office in the morning. The air is crisp and cool but fresh, and you can't help but inhale deeply, filling your lungs with the deliciousness of autumn.
That being said, Fall is my least favourite of the seasons. Everything is coming to an end, most things are starting to die, or at least prepare for winter hibernation. The days are getting shorter and colder - it's all so depressing.
It's actually Spring that brings me joy. Everything is coming to life, the earth is beginning to warm, and what was considered cold only a few weeks prior, is now cause for jubilation. The first flowers start to peek through the last of the melting snow, the robins and the geese start to come back home, and the days start getting longer and longer.
Although Winter is most people's least favourite season, it's actually my second favourite. Don't get me wrong - I don't enjoy the cold, but the beauty of the first snowfall, or a morning of hoarfrost is indescribably beautiful. The branches of the trees literally sparkle as if encrusted with diamonds, and the crunch of the freshly fallen snow is as comforting as the sound of biting in to a freshly toasted slice of bread smothered in butter and homemade strawberry preserves.
I got my hair cut and colored today. It's grown quite a bit over the past few months, but with winter coming, which means sweaters and turtlenecks, I thought it best to welcome the season-change with a new Fall colour and cut. Thanks to my best friend in Missouri, Tara, for the inspiring photos and ideas! I'm very happy with the outcome.
We're doing some renovations to our house - namely building a larger front porch. I've always wanted a traditional wrap-around porch, but our house isn't quite designed for that, so I'll have to settle for a smaller version. Hopefully construction will begin soon as I'd like to enjoy it at least for a little while before the snow comes. I look forward to brewing a pot of Chai or a steamy cup of hot chocolate and sitting outside on the porch in the evening under a blanket of stars. Hopefully, it's not much longer ...
I remember as a child, the days and seasons seemed so long. It felt like it took forever for the summer to pass before you could go back to school and see your friends again, but somehow, as an adult, time just seems to go by so fast.
I'm constantly reminded at work how quickly time goes by. We use the Julian Calendar to derive our confirmation numbers for our clients, so it's a daily reminder of how far we've come, and how little time we have left. Today is day 261. We're officially more than 70% of the way through the year. Sobering thought, eh?
Today was beautiful - sunny and warm. The evenings are quite cool now, often falling below zero, but we're still able to pull off some pretty warm days. There's nothing I treasure more than my last few steps before I enter my office in the morning. The air is crisp and cool but fresh, and you can't help but inhale deeply, filling your lungs with the deliciousness of autumn.
That being said, Fall is my least favourite of the seasons. Everything is coming to an end, most things are starting to die, or at least prepare for winter hibernation. The days are getting shorter and colder - it's all so depressing.
It's actually Spring that brings me joy. Everything is coming to life, the earth is beginning to warm, and what was considered cold only a few weeks prior, is now cause for jubilation. The first flowers start to peek through the last of the melting snow, the robins and the geese start to come back home, and the days start getting longer and longer.
Although Winter is most people's least favourite season, it's actually my second favourite. Don't get me wrong - I don't enjoy the cold, but the beauty of the first snowfall, or a morning of hoarfrost is indescribably beautiful. The branches of the trees literally sparkle as if encrusted with diamonds, and the crunch of the freshly fallen snow is as comforting as the sound of biting in to a freshly toasted slice of bread smothered in butter and homemade strawberry preserves.
I got my hair cut and colored today. It's grown quite a bit over the past few months, but with winter coming, which means sweaters and turtlenecks, I thought it best to welcome the season-change with a new Fall colour and cut. Thanks to my best friend in Missouri, Tara, for the inspiring photos and ideas! I'm very happy with the outcome.
We're doing some renovations to our house - namely building a larger front porch. I've always wanted a traditional wrap-around porch, but our house isn't quite designed for that, so I'll have to settle for a smaller version. Hopefully construction will begin soon as I'd like to enjoy it at least for a little while before the snow comes. I look forward to brewing a pot of Chai or a steamy cup of hot chocolate and sitting outside on the porch in the evening under a blanket of stars. Hopefully, it's not much longer ...
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Hello, Stranger
I know, I know ... it's been a while.
It's certainly not because nothing's going on :) Too much to do, too little time.
It's been a pretty busy summer, and an insanely hot one. We haven't had to mow the lawn all summer! And no mosquitoes either! I imagine this is what heaven must be like.
Some sad news on Monday - Jack Layton, leader of the NDP passed away (from a still undisclosed form of cancer).
I remember seeing him just a few short weeks ago on TV as he announced that he had been diagnosed with a new form of cancer and was temporarily stepping down to focus on his health.
He had gone from a fairly healthy looking, robust man, to just a shell of himself, looking extremely gaunt and tired, but nonetheless, putting on a brave face and delivering a brave message.
A few of us at work were discussing the images of Jack, and someone said, "He's a fighter - he'll be back". I remember thinking to myself, "I remember that look .... and you don't come back from that."
He reminded me so much of my Dad - a fighter who despite how he was really feeling, or despite the prognosis, was positive to the very end.
Seeing Jack and hearing of his recent passing have conjured up the last images I have of my Dad in the last few hours before he passed away. I remember the shallow breathing, I remember how frail and helpless he looked. I remember telling him it was ok to leave us, and that it was time for him to go.
While no one wishes for a loved one to die, we do hope and wish that their suffering will end.
Jack's suffering has finally ended, and the next step in his family's journey will begin. I wish them peace.
I'll sign-off by posting the last letter that Jack wrote to his country, just days before his passing.
Rest in peace, Jack.
Dear Friends,
Tens of thousands of Canadians have written to me in recent weeks to wish me well. I want to thank each and every one of you for your thoughtful, inspiring and often beautiful notes, cards and gifts. Your spirit and love have lit up my home, my spirit, and my determination.
Unfortunately my treatment has not worked out as I hoped. So I am giving this letter to my partner Olivia to share with you in the circumstance in which I cannot continue.
I recommend that Hull-Aylmer MP Nycole Turmel continue her work as our interim leader until a permanent successor is elected.
I recommend the party hold a leadership vote as early as possible in the New Year, on approximately the same timelines as in 2003, so that our new leader has ample time to reconsolidate our team, renew our party and our program, and move forward towards the next election.
A few additional thoughts:
To other Canadians who are on journeys to defeat cancer and to live their lives, I say this: please don’t be discouraged that my own journey hasn’t gone as well as I had hoped. You must not lose your own hope. Treatments and therapies have never been better in the face of this disease. You have every reason to be optimistic, determined, and focused on the future. My only other advice is to cherish every moment with those you love at every stage of your journey, as I have done this summer.
To the members of my party: we’ve done remarkable things together in the past eight years. It has been a privilege to lead the New Democratic Party and I am most grateful for your confidence, your support, and the endless hours of volunteer commitment you have devoted to our cause. There will be those who will try to persuade you to give up our cause. But that cause is much bigger than any one leader. Answer them by recommitting with energy and determination to our work. Remember our proud history of social justice, universal health care, public pensions and making sure no one is left behind. Let’s continue to move forward. Let’s demonstrate in everything we do in the four years before us that we are ready to serve our beloved Canada as its next government.
To the members of our parliamentary caucus: I have been privileged to work with each and every one of you. Our caucus meetings were always the highlight of my week. It has been my role to ask a great deal from you. And now I am going to do so again. Canadians will be closely watching you in the months to come. Colleagues, I know you will make the tens of thousands of members of our party proud of you by demonstrating the same seamless teamwork and solidarity that has earned us the confidence of millions of Canadians in the recent election.
To my fellow Quebecers: On May 2nd, you made an historic decision. You decided that the way to replace Canada’s Conservative federal government with something better was by working together in partnership with progressive-minded Canadians across the country. You made the right decision then; it is still the right decision today; and it will be the right decision right through to the next election, when we will succeed, together. You have elected a superb team of New Democrats to Parliament. They are going to be doing remarkable things in the years to come to make this country better for us all.
To young Canadians: All my life I have worked to make things better. Hope and optimism have defined my political career, and I continue to be hopeful and optimistic about Canada. Young people have been a great source of inspiration for me. I have met and talked with so many of you about your dreams, your frustrations, and your ideas for change. More and more, you are engaging in politics because you want to change things for the better. Many of you have placed your trust in our party. As my time in political life draws to a close I want to share with you my belief in your power to change this country and this world. There are great challenges before you, from the overwhelming nature of climate change to the unfairness of an economy that excludes so many from our collective wealth, and the changes necessary to build a more inclusive and generous Canada. I believe in you. Your energy, your vision, your passion for justice are exactly what this country needs today. You need to be at the heart of our economy, our political life, and our plans for the present and the future.
And finally, to all Canadians: Canada is a great country, one of the hopes of the world. We can be a better one – a country of greater equality, justice, and opportunity. We can build a prosperous economy and a society that shares its benefits more fairly. We can look after our seniors. We can offer better futures for our children. We can do our part to save the world’s environment. We can restore our good name in the world. We can do all of these things because we finally have a party system at the national level where there are real choices; where your vote matters; where working for change can actually bring about change. In the months and years to come, New Democrats will put a compelling new alternative to you. My colleagues in our party are an impressive, committed team. Give them a careful hearing; consider the alternatives; and consider that we can be a better, fairer, more equal country by working together. Don’t let them tell you it can’t be done.
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.
All my very best,
Jack Layton
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Oh what a night ...
Being Saturday, I of course was at work today. I started the day off feeling not quite right (sore throat, ear ache, and generally feeling queasy) but I wasn't sick enough to stay home, so I headed in to work for about 8am. I stopped off to get oatmeal and a bagel at Tim Horton's on the way, and Dena, one of my close friends, stopped off at McDonald's to get us coffee (the bagel was for her).
Every Saturday I like to send electronic updates to my staff on their quarter-to-date results, and although it can be quite time consuming, I know they appreciate the information.
I had sushi for lunch - probably not the best thing to have when you're not feeling so hot, but I didn't have a ton of it, and by day's end, I was feeling better.
I came home, cleaned up the house a bit, and started to get ready for GNO (Girls Night Out).
I made dinner reservations a few weeks ago at Cafe Dario for myself and 7 friends. My best friend Paula from Selkirk came in for dinner (Selkirk is about an hour outside of Winnipeg). I don't get to see her often enough, so seeing her is always a real treat. I also got to see Shannon whom I haven't seen since my Dad's memorial service. Shannon and Joanne both drove over to my place so we could all carpool together. Cass and Betty came together and met as at the restaurant, and rounding off the group were Rebeca and Rhiann. Rhiann is honestly THE funniest person I know, and she's wickedly smart and witty, which I think makes a lethal combination for the most comedic people. In my opinion, I think not all smart people are funny, but all funny people are smart. What do you think of my theory?
If it weren't for the great company, I'm not sure I'd be so happy about Cafe Dario mainly because of the terrible service, but dinner itself was quite good, especially considering the $35/person price tag, which included your single choice between 5-6 appetizers (I had the Escargot Diablo), soup (sweet corn and tomato), salad (with a very good roasted red pepper dressing), your single choice between 5-6 entrees (I had the new york strip loin which came with garlic mashed potatoes and pureed beets), and dessert (chocolate orange mousse). When you consider you'd probably pay $30 for the steak alone at a restaurant, the price is quite amazing I think. I think everyone felt full but not stuffed after the meal, and every single course was as visually appealing as it was delicious.
After dinner, I drove Rhiann home (downtown), then Shannon and Joanne and I drove back to my place so they could get their vehicles.
Events like this remind me not only how important it is to have a great network of friends, but how lucky I am to have such a supportive group of ladies in my life.
A toast to great friends!
I can't wait to see you all at the next dinner!! :)
Friday, June 10, 2011
Being grateful
Did I ever tell you that I work for the greatest organization in the world? Well, I do. Call it being "loyal to the Royal", or "bleeding blue and gold" - I love my employer through and through.
This week we celebrated "Employee Appreciation" - for us, a week long event of showing appreciation to our employees for the amazing jobs they do each and every day.
We've marked the event by having a week-long celebration, enjoying everything from games (Minute-to-win-it style), to a quarterly performance celebration, to casual dress week, to a free BBQ, to hand-delivered choco-pops with a note of appreciation ... the list goes on. I don't know that many organizations go to the lengths that RBC does to celebrate their employees, but I am so grateful and PROUD to work for such an amazing company.
I celebrated by getting my weekly 45-minute team meeting extended to an hour, and taking my team off site to enjoy iced coffees and not have a meeting focused only on work. It was a beautiful day and I think everyone enjoyed the opportunity to be outside enjoying the fresh air.
The daycare that Romeo goes to was also appreciative of his marbled spice cake, which they were kind enough to take a picture of and post to their FB page! I made a quick molasses glaze yesterday morning before we took the cake to school, and I asked for honest feedback since, A) I had never made it before, and B) I wasn't going to be able to try it. They said it was great, but I think they don't want to hurt my feelings :) Oh well ... :)
Today is "Blue Water Day" at RBC. We're celebrating RBC's commitment to a variety of water conservation initiatives worldwide, including RBC's commitment to donating over $50 million globally over a ten-year period (from 2007 to 2017) for such causes. Yet ANOTHER reason I love RBC!
Time to get ready for work. All employees are encouraged to wear blue in honour of Blue Water Day, so I'll pick through what I have to wear and play my part. I'm grateful that I work for a company that is not only internationally well recognized but more importantly, a company who is so well respected by many.
What are you grateful for?
Make it a great day, everyone!
This week we celebrated "Employee Appreciation" - for us, a week long event of showing appreciation to our employees for the amazing jobs they do each and every day.
We've marked the event by having a week-long celebration, enjoying everything from games (Minute-to-win-it style), to a quarterly performance celebration, to casual dress week, to a free BBQ, to hand-delivered choco-pops with a note of appreciation ... the list goes on. I don't know that many organizations go to the lengths that RBC does to celebrate their employees, but I am so grateful and PROUD to work for such an amazing company.
I celebrated by getting my weekly 45-minute team meeting extended to an hour, and taking my team off site to enjoy iced coffees and not have a meeting focused only on work. It was a beautiful day and I think everyone enjoyed the opportunity to be outside enjoying the fresh air.
The daycare that Romeo goes to was also appreciative of his marbled spice cake, which they were kind enough to take a picture of and post to their FB page! I made a quick molasses glaze yesterday morning before we took the cake to school, and I asked for honest feedback since, A) I had never made it before, and B) I wasn't going to be able to try it. They said it was great, but I think they don't want to hurt my feelings :) Oh well ... :)
Today is "Blue Water Day" at RBC. We're celebrating RBC's commitment to a variety of water conservation initiatives worldwide, including RBC's commitment to donating over $50 million globally over a ten-year period (from 2007 to 2017) for such causes. Yet ANOTHER reason I love RBC!
Time to get ready for work. All employees are encouraged to wear blue in honour of Blue Water Day, so I'll pick through what I have to wear and play my part. I'm grateful that I work for a company that is not only internationally well recognized but more importantly, a company who is so well respected by many.
What are you grateful for?
Make it a great day, everyone!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
I'm baaaaaaaaack ...
So I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. On the contrary, I'm returning to all of the things I used to do before my Dad passed away.
So what have I been up to? Wow ... where do I start??
Well, I've been to the mall. Yep - I said that mall. When my Dad was was moved to the hospital and then the hospice in February, most of my spare time was spent at the hospice, and there were some weeks where I barely even got our grocery shopping done. I hadn't been to St Vital in eons, and I wasn't even sure I knew how to get to Polo Park anymore! Turns out, they're both still in their original locations, and they both welcomed me with open arms :) I engaged in some much needed retail therapy, and got some great deals along the way.
I've done some crafting, mostly jewelry and cards. Let this be a hint to anyone who crafts out there - your craft just isn't complete unless you have glitter on it!! Trust me.
I've done some reading and have a few different books on the go:
"The Slap", which is a book about a guy who slaps a child who is not his own at a BBQ and the ensuing fall-out from 8 different peoples' perspectives. I have to say, when I first started it, I was LOST with 8 people at a BBQ all being introduced within just a couple of pages, but the style is very Grapes of Wrath-ish, and I'm quite enjoying it.
I'm also reading "This is not a book - Adventures in Popular Philosophy" which is a very high-level overview of the four branches of philosophy and the philosophers whose work has influenced thinking in that area. Similar in style, I'm also reading "This book has feelings - adventures in the philosophy and psychology of your mind". Fortunately the chapters are short in those two books, so things don't get too heavy.
I'm also reading Tina Fey's autobiography "Bossypants". It's not bad, certainly way better than Peter Russell's autobiography, but for someone I find quite entertaining and humorous, I find her autobio a little on the boring side.
And of course I ALWAYS have room on my nightstand for a cookbook or two, or three, or four ...
I went to the library for the first time in forever and found volume 1 and 2 of a book called "The Cake Mix Doctor". As a die-hard cook and baker, I'm always looking to expand my circle of willing guinea pigs to try my latest creation, and The Cake Mix Doctor is comprised of recipes that use cake mix as the base. As I blog, I'm baking a Marbled Spice bundt cake for Romeo to take to daycare tomorrow. Correction - Romeo is baking it, he always does. I've never made it before and won't get a chance to try it, so I'll have to rely on our girls at the daycare to give me their honest feedback.
Lastly, I planted a garden. Yes, you read it right - I. Planted. A. Garden. There's probably nothing I hate more than gardening, and had all but given up on EVER trying to plant a garden again after the yearly disasters I've created, but one of the girls I work with mentioned "square-foot gardening" and after she explained it to me, I was inspired to try it one more time.
The concept of square-foot gardening is that you plant your vegetables in 1 sqaure-foot "plots", usually in a raised box, no more than 4'x4'. Unlike traditional gardening, which grows stuff in rows, square-foot gardening has everything planted in square-foot plots right next to each other, virtually eliminating weeding, and creates an ultra-efficient garden (no wasted water, no wasted fertilizer etc) Although the photo below is not my OWN garden, you'll get the idea from the photo.
I was on vacation the week of May 23rd and with a little help (ok, a LOT of help), I got my garden weeded, tilled, constructed, and planted. I went out to water the garden a few nights ago and was pleasantly surprised to see the beginnings of the radishes I planted! I'm so excited!! I ended up with 20 square-feet of plantable area, in a 48 square-foot frame. Apart from radishes, I also planted strawberries, rosemary, cilantro, two types of basil, two types of tomatoes, onions, garlic, two red and golden beets, swiss chard, eggplants, peppers and carrots. Because of the nature of square-foot gardening, you don't end up with tons and tons of food that you need to give away, so it helps to cut down on food that goes to waste. Once the garden is up and running, I'll post some pics of my actual garden.
I've also started going to hot yoga again, and I'm reminded just how much I missed it. I'm also reminded how out of shape I am, but yoga is so forgiving, and I have already noticed a difference in just 1 week.
On a personal front, things are going better than expected (I think?). I think of my Dad often, and am occasionally reminded that he's not here anymore and that I can't just pick up the phone and talk to him anymore. My Dad was a great singer, and was always singing, and now I wish that we had taped him singing so I could listen to it now. Oh well ....
My Mom has finally decided to live with my sister here in Winnipeg on a permanent basis. At first, I had reservations about it for many reasons, but my sister says things are working out well for now, and although it's an adjustment for everyone, I do hope that in the long-run, things will work out for the best. My Mom living with my sister is somewhat conditional on my Mom enrolling herself in extracurricular activities to keep her on-the-go, and she seems to agree with that notion. My Mom will be going out West in July/August for about one month to visit my other sister in Calgary and my niece in Edmonton.
So that's it in a very summarized nut-shell.
Sorry for the extended hiatus, everyone, but I think it's what I needed.
I will update again soon, maybe with photos of my new garden? :) Wish me luck!!
So what have I been up to? Wow ... where do I start??
Well, I've been to the mall. Yep - I said that mall. When my Dad was was moved to the hospital and then the hospice in February, most of my spare time was spent at the hospice, and there were some weeks where I barely even got our grocery shopping done. I hadn't been to St Vital in eons, and I wasn't even sure I knew how to get to Polo Park anymore! Turns out, they're both still in their original locations, and they both welcomed me with open arms :) I engaged in some much needed retail therapy, and got some great deals along the way.
I've done some crafting, mostly jewelry and cards. Let this be a hint to anyone who crafts out there - your craft just isn't complete unless you have glitter on it!! Trust me.
I've done some reading and have a few different books on the go:
"The Slap", which is a book about a guy who slaps a child who is not his own at a BBQ and the ensuing fall-out from 8 different peoples' perspectives. I have to say, when I first started it, I was LOST with 8 people at a BBQ all being introduced within just a couple of pages, but the style is very Grapes of Wrath-ish, and I'm quite enjoying it.
I'm also reading "This is not a book - Adventures in Popular Philosophy" which is a very high-level overview of the four branches of philosophy and the philosophers whose work has influenced thinking in that area. Similar in style, I'm also reading "This book has feelings - adventures in the philosophy and psychology of your mind". Fortunately the chapters are short in those two books, so things don't get too heavy.
I'm also reading Tina Fey's autobiography "Bossypants". It's not bad, certainly way better than Peter Russell's autobiography, but for someone I find quite entertaining and humorous, I find her autobio a little on the boring side.
And of course I ALWAYS have room on my nightstand for a cookbook or two, or three, or four ...
I went to the library for the first time in forever and found volume 1 and 2 of a book called "The Cake Mix Doctor". As a die-hard cook and baker, I'm always looking to expand my circle of willing guinea pigs to try my latest creation, and The Cake Mix Doctor is comprised of recipes that use cake mix as the base. As I blog, I'm baking a Marbled Spice bundt cake for Romeo to take to daycare tomorrow. Correction - Romeo is baking it, he always does. I've never made it before and won't get a chance to try it, so I'll have to rely on our girls at the daycare to give me their honest feedback.
Lastly, I planted a garden. Yes, you read it right - I. Planted. A. Garden. There's probably nothing I hate more than gardening, and had all but given up on EVER trying to plant a garden again after the yearly disasters I've created, but one of the girls I work with mentioned "square-foot gardening" and after she explained it to me, I was inspired to try it one more time.
The concept of square-foot gardening is that you plant your vegetables in 1 sqaure-foot "plots", usually in a raised box, no more than 4'x4'. Unlike traditional gardening, which grows stuff in rows, square-foot gardening has everything planted in square-foot plots right next to each other, virtually eliminating weeding, and creates an ultra-efficient garden (no wasted water, no wasted fertilizer etc) Although the photo below is not my OWN garden, you'll get the idea from the photo.
I was on vacation the week of May 23rd and with a little help (ok, a LOT of help), I got my garden weeded, tilled, constructed, and planted. I went out to water the garden a few nights ago and was pleasantly surprised to see the beginnings of the radishes I planted! I'm so excited!! I ended up with 20 square-feet of plantable area, in a 48 square-foot frame. Apart from radishes, I also planted strawberries, rosemary, cilantro, two types of basil, two types of tomatoes, onions, garlic, two red and golden beets, swiss chard, eggplants, peppers and carrots. Because of the nature of square-foot gardening, you don't end up with tons and tons of food that you need to give away, so it helps to cut down on food that goes to waste. Once the garden is up and running, I'll post some pics of my actual garden.
I've also started going to hot yoga again, and I'm reminded just how much I missed it. I'm also reminded how out of shape I am, but yoga is so forgiving, and I have already noticed a difference in just 1 week.
On a personal front, things are going better than expected (I think?). I think of my Dad often, and am occasionally reminded that he's not here anymore and that I can't just pick up the phone and talk to him anymore. My Dad was a great singer, and was always singing, and now I wish that we had taped him singing so I could listen to it now. Oh well ....
My Mom has finally decided to live with my sister here in Winnipeg on a permanent basis. At first, I had reservations about it for many reasons, but my sister says things are working out well for now, and although it's an adjustment for everyone, I do hope that in the long-run, things will work out for the best. My Mom living with my sister is somewhat conditional on my Mom enrolling herself in extracurricular activities to keep her on-the-go, and she seems to agree with that notion. My Mom will be going out West in July/August for about one month to visit my other sister in Calgary and my niece in Edmonton.
So that's it in a very summarized nut-shell.
Sorry for the extended hiatus, everyone, but I think it's what I needed.
I will update again soon, maybe with photos of my new garden? :) Wish me luck!!
Friday, May 13, 2011
The man in the brown pants
A full week at work is now under my belt and I'm feeling "normal" returning slowly but surely.
I had a few funny-oops moments this week with some colleagues who came by to say that they hadn't seen me in a while and wondered how my vacation was. I think not that long ago I'd be stuck for something to say, but now it's easy to just say, "my Dad passed away". They of course feel guilty, but I remind them that there's nothing to feel guilty about! It's not like they knew and pretended they didn't know, right? They didn't know, so don't feel guilty about asking.
It's interesting to see how many people have lost a loved one and feel the exact same things I do. It's really kind of cool in a way. We're our own group out there!
I had a friend this week who recently suffered her own loss. Her beloved fur baby died and she was devastated. She's had her "baby" since he was a 3-week old kitten, and although he had been sick for some time, it didn't soften the blow. She mentioned how sometimes she seems him out of the corner of her eye, and I told her that I too had signs from my Dad shortly after he passed. That's when she told me about "the man in the brown pants".
Her husband, a friend of mine as well as a work colleague, lost his Dad suddenly to a heart attack a few years ago. He was devastated by the loss, and told me that it took a good one-and-a-half to two years to recover. (That scared me a little bit!) Over the years, he and I have pondered the following: If you had it to choose, would you choose to lose a loved one suddenly, or would you rather lose them to an illness?
I know, from our conversations, losing a loved one suddenly leaves a lot of unanswered questions and a lot of things unresolved. I know from experience that losing a loved one to a chronic, long-term illness is emotionally, physically, and mentally draining to everyone involved. There are scary days when I feel like I don't even remember the way my Dad was anymore - I can only think of him in terms of his illness. I see flashes of images of his frail body laying in a crumpled heap on his hospital bed. I see his once strong arms and hands as nothing more than skin and bones. I see old birthday cards from my Dad, or a piece of paper with a note that he's written, and I see his once-upon-a-time beautiful penmanship, which near the end turned into scrawly printing. It's heart-breaking.
I guess we never found an answer to our question, but I know that my experience, and that of my friend are the two extremes. Something in between is probably the best case scenario - not too long to suffer, but long enough to say goodbye.
So - what of "the man in the brown pants"?
My friend and I were talking about the "signs" that I saw in the days immediately after my Dad's passing. She said that she saw signs too after her father-in-law passed away. At the time of her father-in-law's sudden passing, she was about 36-weeks pregnant. In honour of his memory, they gave their daughter a middle name of Kenley in memory of her father-in-law "Ken". Apparently Ken was known for wearing a certain type of brown pants which his son has been known to wear as well.
Shortly after "Kenley" was born, my friend went up to Kenley's room to see her in her crib and she saw the "man in the brown pants" standing near the crib. She didn't see a face, not even really a torso, but saw the familiar brown pants, and then they just disappeared.
The man in the brown pants came by every now and then - she would see him floating from room to room, or he'd be "communicating" with Kenley, or more accurately, Kenley was communicating with him. She recalled how one night she was feeding the baby and the baby was stretching her arms out as if to be picked up, but she wasn't holding her arms up to her mother, she was holding her arms up to someone or something NEXT to her mother. My friend didn't always see the man in the brown pants even when the baby did, but she knew he was there just by the way the baby was acting.
It's been some time since the man in the brown pants has made an appearance, but in listening to her story, I couldn't help but think that the signs come when we need them most.
Last night I was at Chapters browsing through the books and came across a book titled "Drood". My Dad's name (an you'll recall) is Dood (Drood minus the "R") and the irony is that the title of the book was written in script in much the same way that my Dad wrote his own name. It was freaky, but as of late, I've been wondering why the signs aren't as frequent anymore. And then there it was, (or maybe I'm making too much of it). In any case, I remembered my Dad and smiled for a moment thinking that he knew I've been thinking about him and needed to know if he was ok.
Anyway - enough of my rambling for tonight.
I'm off to fill out my census form on-line. If you haven't already done it, and there's still time, please do it (today is the deadline)! For each Manitoban that doesn't fill it out there's a $42,000 reduction in provincial transfer payments from the federal government. Do your part!
Good night everyone and enjoy your weekend!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Archived emails now uploaded
Quick update -
So my blog was officially started on April 23rd, but long before the blog, there were emails that were sent out to a handful of special people.
The emails were starting to get longer and longer, and the distribution list was getting more and more complicated.
I decided that I would stop emailing and start a blog with a promise, one day, to upload some of the emails that I sent.
I finally got around to it this evening.
Feel free to peruse the old emails/new uploaded blogs dated April 2011.
As always, feel free to comment, or not :)
Goodnight all!
So my blog was officially started on April 23rd, but long before the blog, there were emails that were sent out to a handful of special people.
The emails were starting to get longer and longer, and the distribution list was getting more and more complicated.
I decided that I would stop emailing and start a blog with a promise, one day, to upload some of the emails that I sent.
I finally got around to it this evening.
Feel free to peruse the old emails/new uploaded blogs dated April 2011.
As always, feel free to comment, or not :)
Goodnight all!
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